In Islam, we have all heard that hadith, haven’t we? Think of seventy excuses for your brother or
sister. A way to excuse someone’s behaviour because the truth is, everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt.

Well, let’s clear one thing up about this. It is not actually an authentic hadith. It wasn’t actually said by the Prophet (ﷺ). It was actually narrated by Hamdun al-Qassar, an early Muslim, from around the 9th
century C.E.

See why is it seventy excuses? Seventy excuses because in reality, we are human. It is in our nature to make mistakes; it is in our nature to sin. And the truth is, we could never really know a person’s true intention because we were never blessed with that ability. We don’t know the reasoning behind
people’s behaviour and why they react the way they do and why they treat others the way they do. So as good Muslims, we are taught to always see the good in people and as hard as that may be sometimes, we genuinely should not assume the explanations for someone’s behaviour. The truth is, it’s difficult to even find ten excuses for someone’s behaviour, let alone seventy. But let’s examine this – why did al-Qassar say seventy? Why not ten or twenty excuses? In my opinion, it was to illustrate how deep our mercy should be for someone, how far we should be willing to go to excuse someone and think good of them.

The positives of this is that whilst it’s not actually an authentic hadith, it is good evidence to live life by. If we thought good of others and others did the same of us, a lot of negativity in this world would be eliminated.

But there is a slight negative side to this; it should never be used to excuse abusive, violent behaviour that could potentially be life-threatening. Because some behaviour is inexcusable and should never be accepted on any level. As well as this, just because we should technically morally justify one’s behaviour to give them the benefit of the doubt does not mean we let it happen over and over again, continuously. Because the Prophet (ﷺ) did once say:

I saw this on another blog online, Ruqaya’s Bookshelf, and I thought about how accurate that is. Once trust is broken, it’s like crumpled paper. No matter how many times you try to smooth out the creases, they will always be somewhat visible. And by all means, trust people and find seventy excuses for their
behaviour to think good of them. But that does not necessarily mean that you should put yourself in a vulnerable position to be pushed about and hurt. Like Ruqaya wrote in her blog, as Muslims and humans in general, we should learn from our mistakes and learn how to forgive people who make mistakes. We should learn how to keep a cover on other people’s sins and blunders and if possible,
help them through difficult times.

And Allah knows best.